Flower Essences for Public Speaking, Healing Perverted Loyalty, Birthing our True Selves, Balancing our Lives

Your email questions inspire me- Here are some recent ones! Thank you.

Q: I am in a work situation where it would be very helpful if people saw me clearly and heard what I had to say. I have got some presentations to do as well as situations in which I need to be seen as an equal participant. What Essences might help with this?

A: The most straightforward answer to this question would be to suggest Showcats. It helps us express ourselves in a genuine, heart felt and dynamic manner. It helps those of us who feel shy to stand our ground. It is a very balancing Essence as well as an encouraging one.

The thing about expressing ourselves or being seen in a group is that it is almost never a straightforward thing. Sometimes the nature of the situation is that the actual problem in an exchange is not how eloquent we are but whether others are willing to contain us. It’s challenging to communicate well when others are not fully present to listen to us.

When we hold a vibration of being grounded, we at least offer a model of being present to those around us. Whether they take us up on this is another thing. When I was out on the lecture circuit in the early years of the farm, I would take Flower Essences before any talk and offer the audience Flower Essences as well.  After some mighty alarming experiences dealing with ungrounded audiences, I began any talk I gave by also having my audience do a grounding meditation with me first.

All Flower Essences are grounding not just the Essences in our Grounding mix so I would go with whatever Flower Essence the Angels suggested- I remember offering Rosemary and also Sunflower at different lectures. I found that if the crowd got grounded, I could be my most eloquent.

I also experienced situations in which the crowd had no interest in being grounded, and it was difficult for me to make sense or go deep. It’s been really helpful for me to learn that I am not 100% responsible for a talk just because I am the speaker. When I am my most eloquent, I salute the listeners who are holding that space for me so beautifully. It’s a two way street.   When I get all confused and lose my train of thought, I at least consider that perhaps no one is available at this point to receive what I have to share, and it is really okay for me to back off and share less.

As you think about the situations where you will contribute, consider what factors are in your control and what are not. Some groups I spoke to were not open to a talk about working with Nature in a new way. How people described themselves was not an indicator of who was truly open. Sometimes self described alternative thinkers were dug into their position before I began and I needed to roll with having my experiences bounce right back to me. My job was always to do my best but let go of outcomes.

When a group was ready to receive and soak it all in, we could go on an enormous adventure of discovery. I received so much from spirit because the audience wanted to receive. I was as surprised as the crowd by where a talk went. The whole talk could soar in such a profound way leaving me so grateful to the participants for their open receptivity.

Equanimity would be an Essence to support you in speaking your truth and letting go of outcomes. So often there are many power dynamics at work when we are speaking to a group. Equanimity reminds us that our value is imperishable and we are never defined by the response our sharing receives.

Q: I am a therapist looking for some suggestions for specific issues.

In general, can you think of Flower Essences that would help me get through people’s walls via cracks and crevices?

A: The Angels suggested Burdock. As a plant it has an exceedingly long tap root that can penetrate deep into hard packed earth. As a Flower Essence it helps us get to the core issue. It has a lot of persistence as a plant and as a remedy. This energetic persistence as well as its ability to penetrate anything would make it an excellent choice for this dynamic.

Q: How can I amplify the energy of an Essence someone is using when it is almost bringing about a shift but not quite?

A: Radish (from our Additional Essence list) amplifies the energy of any Flower Essence it is used with.

Q: What would you suggest for perverted loyalty, loyalty to self destructive causes and the wrong people?

A: When a child is not allowed to experience and own his or her authentic self or when a child’s gifts, offered from a genuine place of self, are not received and contained by a parent, the child can grow into a people pleasing adult who perverts his or her own interests to receive the attention and love of those around him or her. To put this another way- If a child’s mother doesn’t like the shiny rock the child has offered her, the child will give her what she wants and thus lose track of what actually interests his or her self.

As an adult, we can reclaim a knowledge of self through dream work. Pyrola Elliptica is a Flower Essence that supports dream work and a bringing of the unconscious to consciousness (Often we have gone so far into people pleasing that we are unconscious of what we love). Creative activity also taps us into what we genuinely care about as does finding a fellow human who will bear witness to our search.

Flowers by their nature express their genuine self so it is not surprising that so many Flower Essences help us FIND and EXPRESS our selves; Blue Flag Iris, Asclepias, Blueberry, Irish Heaths, Watermelon, Lady’s Mantle, Pomegranate, Clivia and Nicker Nut are just a few the possibilities here-  Check out the Flower Essence suggestions for Common Concerns list for many specific suggestions for self expression or giving voice to our creativity.

I do want to mention one duo because this duo offers such needed support right now for this dynamic of moving from a perverted expression of self towards a genuine one. This duo is the Sacred Feminine and the Sacred Masculine.

To some extent, all of us have been turned from a complete expression of our wholeness to do what the world has demanded of us. This means that birthing a genuine experience of self is going to involve pain for all of us. Its painful to shed false values that got us the attention we desire in favor of these raw, half understood and vulnerable newborn ideas of self.   The current societal structures don’t exactly throw a party when we break with the conventions to express something different. It requires a lot from us to do this work. It requires a lot of checking back in with our heart and a lot of mess as we try and translate heart into action. These two Flower Essence friends are allies as we do this work.

Birthing self is a process of letting go of control of who we think we are to let our soul speak and express itself however it needs to be expressed. The Sacred Feminine helps us open to the birth fearlessly even when the society around us disapproves of what we are birthing- This Essence helps us let go to what needs to be born regardless of what we have been told about who we are. It helps us know the juice of life is with this unknown process going unknown places in an unknown way.

The Sacred Masculine helps us bring forward our inner willpower to support where the birth is taking us. It brings a full measure of trust and unshakeable support to our inner feminine’s intuitive direction. Perverted loyalty is an expression of a self who has lost track of who he or she is. It is a trying to find purpose and praise through the values of others. When we are grounded in our own genuine soul self, perverted loyalty is no more. We know who we are and how we need to authentically express this.

Q: What would you suggest for someone neglecting those dependents in their care?

A: This feels like the same issue as perverted loyalty. Getting in deep contact with our genuine self does not take us towards a luxury vacation in irresponsibility. It takes us towards a realization of our true purposes. It takes us towards a genuine reckoning with what life/our heart calls us to do. The expression of this is not a personality picnic. If we have neglected others to whom we have made a soul contract of responsibility, listening to our soul’s voice through such venues as dream work and journaling is going to call us back to an honest acknowledgement of this soul contract.

It’s not that there are no endings or no shifts in the big patterns of our life when we make contact with our soul. A genuine connection to our souls often leads us away from false contracts based on false values that were born when we were unconscious of who we were. In finding a genuine awareness of soul, clarity about purpose arises, clarity about what we care about arises and clarity about what our heart calls us to do arises. Much will need to be let go but not genuine soul connections or soul contacts. These may finally see the light of day and flourish unimpeded.

Q: I must accomplish a major writing project for my PhD dissertation. It’s a topic I am passionate about though the mechanics leave me concerned. I need to balance the demands of single parenting, work and a return to writing- a creative activity that I left with some regret many years ago.

A: You sound clear in the call of this project. In trusting the purposefulness of this process, you can release yourself into this endeavor with trust in self and the universe that is there to support you.

Recently one of you beloveds told me this story about Einstein. A little girl at one of his talks asked him what the most important question was. He told her that this itself was such a good question that he would have to think about it before answering. Weeks later he returned to her to say he felt the most important question was, “Is the universe a friendly place?”

If we answer this question in the affirmative, then so much of our work is to let go and let the universe help us. For you with this dissertation, if you feel the universe is a friendly place then here are some Essences that might support you in letting go and letting the universe ease you through this birth-

La Rioja and Watermelon– You were called to this work and because of this call, I know there are great creative wellsprings of writing talent within you that will come to you and fill you. These two Flower Essences help us be ripe for this.

‘Bofin Unusual, Giant’s Causeway, Wood Sage from the Burren– Ireland is a place where the veil between formlessness and form is so very thin. It’s not a random thing that Ireland is a place of such creative expression. It is easier in Ireland to bring across the big magic from other realms. These Irish Essences are gifts from this realm and help us joyfully welcome formless imaginings into form and gift’s from out of the blue.

Masterwort, Lady’s Mantle, Sanctuary– Masterwort gives us this space to receive, in fact, space to receive is the nature of what each of these Essences help us with. To receive the words we must be receptive, emptied out, feeling open and safe to receive the unknown.

The Sunflower Spiral, Effort and Grace, Boundless, The Eight Garden– Oh the Venus Garden!  It’s where the rubber meets the road in the most magnificent way! We aren’t just spirit holding our breathe while we inhabit the physical and we aren’t just physical beings separated from the eternal.  Here is this garden the worlds are one.  Year after year this garden gives us a zesty vibrational model of living likewise as divinity in form.  These Essences are so precious in their immense gifts.  They are unique friends giving us a unique inservice about some aspect of being spirit in form.

How does this play out? Humor! Synchronicity!  Answered prayers! Love that embraces us like a pig embraces mud! Unexpected kindnesses from a generous universe that IS paying attention! Wonder! Always so glad this toolbox of Flower Essence friends is there at the ready- for one and all!

Thanks for your questions which have taken me on this journey with you today! Love, Molly