And We Go On

Thank you all so much for your love and prayers.

Someone emailed this morning asking for an update. I don’t exactly know what to say. These situations seem to take so long to move towards a level of safety that feels appropriate to me.

I can say that in addition to my gratitude for your love and prayers, I am grateful for the four different students that went to the guidance counselor to tell her about the “Kill Will league” and the child’s specific plans to kill Will with a 22 handgun. I am also grateful for the support of Jim’s team teacher and the school nurse, both of whom seem to grasp how extreme, even inhumane an expectation it is for Jim to be asked to manage a classroom that includes his son who has been threatened and the child who made the threats.

Jim will continue to manage this classroom with great care and compassion for all involved, but the stress is enormous. I feel very politically incorrect in how I feel about all this. I am deeply sorry for this troubled child and his situation, but I also don’t really trust a risk assessment counselor who after one session decided that there is no cause to change the status quo.

I am grateful for the local police. They know us from our other death threat problems. They have been to the home of this troubled child to make sure the family’s handguns are locked up, but they also cautioned us to be vigilant in our concern.

I am grateful for the tender love of Will’s older siblings. They are good at keeping it light and natural with Will, even as they feel particularly aware of how scary this situation is because they have walked in his shoes themselves. We filled the weekend with badminton and woods walks, a trip for ice cream and hitting a bucket of balls at the driving range. I worked off and on in the gardens. This was a big comfort to me and probably made everyone feel better because it was the most normal thing for me to be doing, not hovering kissing Will’s head every three seconds, but planting one of those wildly complicated gardens that have been our life for so many years.

Lizzy is back from Seattle and working locally. We are glad to have her back for many reasons, but one of them is that she is so close to Will. We are all close after the seven years of trauma with my threatening relative. I hope these ordeals haven’t made us too closed off and that each of the children will choose to trust the world. Whatever they decide, it won’t come out of naivete anyways.

I struggle with my guilt about having given pain by sharing our crappy news with you. One of the worst things about this kind of situation is how isolating it can be. I am trying to put aside my guilt and just be where I am, in need and most grateful for your love and support.


This year’s Venus Garden takes form with the planting of an outside ring of Sweet Peas, planting the fourteen rays with seven rows of Parsley and seven of Nasturtium. A water element in the center is encircled with seven blue pots of climbing Nasturtiums. A White Lotus will go in the center water element when it arrives.

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