There were signs my life was about to change, but some of the clues were a tad obscure.
Fruit salad in the shape of a baby tucked in a watermelon cradle? Was I really supposed to understand this cryptic message? All I knew was I wanted someone to feed me my grapes one at a time like always.
When I saw this vaguely castle like cake at the baby shower, I figured it was about me- given my status as royalty. But I couldn’t read the fine print.
Had I been able to read this obnoxious sign on the top of the cake, I might have been more prepared. But can you ever really be prepared for this kind of lifestyle change?
Not to whine……. but the last month has been a bit of an adjustment for me. Massages are down. My exercise routine is in an uproar. The incidents with the porcupines did not give me the results I was seeking. I hoped they would take the spotlight off the baby and return it to me, but my new preoccupation with porcupines just seems to have added insult to injury.
Let’s face it…..with Princess Grace in my castle, it has been hard to be the queen I have always been.
But I have soldiered on. That’s what queens do. I even found time to do some serious research into Flower Essences. When I ran off into the dark on one of the first days of hunting season, I noted that Anxiety was my people’s choice. They shared it with everyone who came to search for me.
During my ongoing love-fest with porcupines, I learned a lot about the pain relief and calming support offered by steady splashes of Animal Emergency Care during a quill removal.
I also learned about the wonders of a concoction of Recovery, Healthy Coat, Anxiety, and the aforementioned Animal Emergency Care for my post quill life. I don’t understand why they are giving me so much Spiderwort also. How is discernment an issue here? Two porcupine incidents in two weeks is an unfortunate coincidence. Nothing more.
Therese Bugnet Rose was another Essence friend who helped after the first go round with the porcupine. It was the day of the Princess’ birth so only the staff goddesses were there to attend to my needs. They removed sixty six porcupine quills with real panache and skill, but there were two out of reach deeply imbedded in my upper jaw. The vet had to go deep for those two.
This meant I had to wear one of those really ghastly plastic cones to keep me from fussing with my stitches. This was tough. I didn’t earn my stripes as a fabulous diva by wearing a lampshade on my head.
Therese Bugnet Rose reminded me that my appearance wasn’t everything. I still had my attitude and general diva personality to lean on. It saw me through the rough patch of being exiled to the farm because I whacked everything with the cone. So I was a klutz with my cone. So I ran into doorways and got stuck under the table. I am used to being svelte and able to fit through small spaces.
Some people thought I might accidentally whack the baby and that I needed to stay at the farm until the cone came off. I was a good sport about this. I knew I was just like the proverbial Hollywood star- out of sight from her public while her plastic surgery healed.
And it did, and the cone came off, and I went home with bells on my toes. Chez Castle Ramirez, Arbor Garden, New Beginnings even Jealousy became my constant companions. Sharing the limelight is tough, but despite the occasional diva moment in which I wanted hand sliced raw meat or need to be brushed just the way I liked it, I did a great job making room for the baby and being kind and gentle to her.
A lot better than MayMay who wants to get in everyone’s laps and be held like a baby.
What is her problem? Doesn’t she realize that in less than a year the little princess will be dropping treats off her high chair for us? Doesn’t she realize that in order to have a three dog night we need the baby to join us? And let’s face it, even with the squawking, the baby is less annoying than the cats.